Deborah Ann (Sauter) Becker

I met Debbie in 1976 and we married on May 19, 1979 at Martin’s West near Security Boulevard.  I remember several things about that wedding. First it was very similar to what her family and friends are going to do on Wednesday December 27th at the Candlelight Funeral Home - - not a “formal” wedding or service but rather a celebration!

In 1979 we were celebrating putting our lives together and in attendance were all of our family and good friends.  Both families mine and Debbie’s sat at one big table, no separation.  In fact my father always referred to the wedding as “a party!”  When Zakk and Joy got married they did the same thing, everyone at one big table.  After the “party” broke up Debbie and I decided the next day to drive to South Carolina to see anyone on her mom’s side of the family that could not make it up.  Debbie’s ties to McCall, South Carolina were very strong and Rhiannon commented that Debbie and her closest cousin Becky (who predeceased her) are probably in heaven with Debbie’s father Bill trying to “rein” them in!  Not possible!

I can tell anyone who is starting to read this “obituary” that I am writing, it will be “long and rambling,” but I have forty-one years to “touch on” and thirty-eight plus years of marriage to cover, so if you are not in for the long ride just skip to the end and you will get the people predeceased and left behind.  If you are interested, get a cup/glass of your favorite beverage and settle back for the long ride!

The first thing when I met Debbie she was already a practicing Registered Nurse at Howard County Hospital.  Her two best friends were Sally and Susie.  Sally was her Maid of Honor at Martin’s when we were married.  Debbie was a terrific nurse, I was constantly amazed at her knowledge of the medical profession, especially being able to diagnose anything and offer options for treatment.  This continued throughout her life.

Everyone would come to her, not only family, but friends and neighbors.  Then she was discovered to have a rare form of Arthritis known at that time as Behcet’s Syndrome.  In 1986 there were 53 people known to have the disease in Maryland.  Last year Debbie told me she was one of three left.  We credited her survival and maintaining a “quality of life” to her doctor Dr.  Kimberly Peairs, her staff and the other physicians on the team – Dr. David Hillman and Dr. William Ravish.  I will touch on the illness and its effects as I go along, but know there was a true “love affair” between Dr. Peair’s team and Debbie for almost eighteen years.

I bring this up here because I do not know if the doctor’s knew about Debbie’s professional career.  She always kept her nursing on “the down low” because she thought they might treat her differently if they thought she knew too much about medicine.  However the children and I can say that she was the “go to” person for anything from a rash to a fever.

Debbie as everyone knows was a real music person, which I found out after starting to date her.  I had spent over three years on the road with a wide variety of headliners before I meet Debbie in 1976 (road 1973-1976): Seals & Crofts, Alice Cooper, Kiss, Uriah Heep, and even a date or two with Led Zeppelin.  However I was not prepared for Debbie and Sally’s more Eclectic Music taste!!  Groups that I knew and toured with, took care of their rider, and stopped by the dressing room and told them when to go on, were “Rock & Roll Gods” to Debbie (and in some cases Sally!!

So I became the conduit to fulfilling Debbie’s dreams of being “back stage” with “All Access Pass” around her neck and everyone saying “Anything I can get for you Mrs. Becker!”  She did tell me more than once it gave her “great” satisfaction to never have to buy a concert ticket!  For my part I was happy to continue to impress Debbie with the groups she loved and admired putting  her in the middle with.  Her photo collection is large and Rhiannon, Zakk, and Alex have found many photos of Debbie with groups and individuals.  She also passed this on to her daughter Rhiannon and made sure she was backstage with New Kids On the Block, met  Davy Jones backstage and got him to sign her book (thanks to Hal Martin), met Eric Martin (Mr. Big) at Hammerjacks along with a “slew” of other musicians and I can not forget Debbie inviting “The Greaseman” and his wife to our house for Rhiannon’s birthday party - - they came and had a great time - - many more times through the years that Rhiannon will tell you about.  For Zakk it was The Jackson’s Tour at RFK and Debbie took Zakk out looking for “just the right outfit” which she found and we were all on the floor “very close to the stage.” For Alex there is a photo of Debbie, Alice Cooper (at the Warner Theater) with Alex and me!

There are so many Rock & Roll stories that if you are reading this and want “more” just stop Rhiannon, Alex or Zakk and they can keep it going.  Or I can fill you in on the acts that I became aware of and had known for years - - that now were in Debbie’s top ten including Crack The Sky with John Palumbo and LITTLE FEAT!

This I will tell.  I knew everyone in Little Feat because the sound and Lights were based in Falls Church, Virginia.  Every year they had an outdoor

Bar-b-que  in Falls Church which I was invited to, (never went!)  After I met Debbie and found her “love” of “Feat” – especially when driving to South Carolina, I accepted their invitation and took Debbie.

One of her favorite stories was that Bar-b-que and Bill Payne (keyboard player) handing Debbie an orange soda!  When we left she “swore” she would never wash that hand again!  She did.  We went to many Little Feat concerts and in particular the George Washington University concert that was recorded for Little Feat “Waiting for Columbus” recorded at Lisner Auditoriumon on the campus of  George Washington University August 1977  (we were there for one of the dates Aug 8–10 1977)   She was there and loved to tell people that!                                                      There are so many stories in the “thousands” that we will all tell for many years to come.  Debbie made an impression no matter where she went, so many times I was “just the driver” and happy to be there.  As anyone who knows the history of “Debbie and Bud” knows that it was not a smooth road, there were many ups and downs and sometimes a detour or two.  However I have so say, no matter the situation I always had Rhiannon, Zakk, and Alexander.  I would be remiss if I did not mention my first child Amanda Marie Santana who is from my first marriage to Linda and now lives on the West Coast with her husband Noberto and son Max.

Amanda was living in Florida and we stayed in touch via telephone.  She expressed a desire to come back to Washington/Maryland and get her education and career on track, but needed a place to stay.  It was Debbie who put the “game in play!”

Debbie and I  were close with my X-mother-in-law (Mrs, Fisher), in fact we were invited to dinner at her house in Bethesda with Debbie, Zakk and Rhiannon.  It was Debbie who contacted Mrs. Fisher and made all the arrangements for Amanda to come to Bethesda Maryland and move-in with Mrs. Fisher.  During this time Amanda met Noberto, went on to graduate in the top third (hope I got that right) of her class at University of Maryland.  Married Noberto, traveled the world (so to speak) and had Maximo.  All because Debbie had a relationship with Zakk’s grandmother!

There are so many more years to cover, but I will close with this thought.  I had 41 years with Debbie, and adventure of a lifetime, I feel sure she is planning ways to haunt me!  I am grateful for all the time we had together – good, bad, in between - - super grateful for the support system I have with Rhiannon, Zakk, Alex, my grand children,  Debbie’s mother Catherine Sauter,,Debbie’s brother Bill and his family plus all the wonderful friends near and far.  Also thanks to Dr. Peairs and her staff . She maintained a “quality of life” right up until the Wednesday of Thanksgiving and with everyone’s support we were able to do the right thing.  Finally my thanks to my thirty year plus friend - Craig Witzke and his wife Deborah for allowing us to have this celebration of Debbie Sauter Becker’s life!

If you skipped to the end, here is the pertinent data:

Debbie leaves behind her husband, Marshall Becker; four children, Rhiannon, William-David Alexander, Zakk and Amanda; and five grandchildren, Grace, Brandon, Aribeth, Kelton and Maximo.

She is also survived by her mother, Catherine Sauter; brother, William Sauter; aunt and Uncle William and Lois Yeager; nieces and nephews, Kristen, William, Kim, Jeffrey, Lindsay and Gary.

She is predeceased in death by her father, William Sauter; and grandparents, William and Mary Catherine Sauter and Ethel and Simon Carlisle.