John J Francis, Jr.

John Joseph Francis, Jr, born October 20, 1932, to John Francis, Sr and Marie Biggs Francis, in Baltimore, MD. Husband of the late Cay Francis. Father of Catherine, Julia, Jane and Andrew.

John was a man, who every step of his life, lived by the words of the song “My Way”-and his way was influenced primarily by his Baltimore upbringing, his Italian heritage and his Marine Corps training.

One of five brothers, John grew up in a rough and tumble world, attending St. Edwards Catholic Elementary School and Forest Park High School. Growing up in this household of brothers, John became an extremely talented athlete with incredible physical strength. In his heyday, on a bet with his friends, he once threw a full size sofa across a room! Yet, more important than his physical strength was the strength of his convictions and integrity.

At St. Edwards, the Catholic faith was instilled in John, and he developed a strong devotion to the Blessed Mother. He remained faithful throughout his life, teaching his children about faith, and the importance of living a good life, not just going to church on Sundays. He was a member of the Knights of Columbus for years, Chaplain of his Marine Corps League, and Treasurer of the Butch Hannon Clown Alley Foundation, which provides meals and gifts to needy families at Christmas. He was an active volunteer at the Dewey Lowman Post American Legion in Arbutus. At the age of 83, despite his recent cancer diagnosis, he drove to Ft. McHenry to inquire about and eventually become a volunteer tour guide there. On December 9th, the Fort flew the American Flag in his honor.

Of course, all of the volunteer work was secondary to his main priority-his wife and children. John met and married his true love, Cay, in 1957, and they shared nearly 56 years together, before Cay predeceased him in 2013. They had four children, and they provided a home filled with love and laughter, discipline and structure, values and morals, fun and security. John showed the world through his actions, rather than words, how much he loved and cared for his wife and family.

One particularly fun part of life in the Francis home were the annual vacations to Ocean City, and “Big John” as he was called by many, would throw his kids around, plow through the waves, rescue them from certain death….and they never knew he couldn’t swim! But they did learn he took swim lessons one year to keep them safe, because he wasn’t going to depend on anyone else to watch out for his kids. Also, because of his Marine background, he didn’t just go set up an umbrella and blankets on the beach. No, he “established a beachhead”, and it was serious business. And he established it at 7:00 a.m.!

Exhibiting extreme discipline in every area of his life, John passed his knowledge on to his children, teaching them everything from how to defend themselves, how to shake hands [firm, no limp grip], remember to laugh, and patience, but with exacting detail: “pick me up at 10:37”. Family time was so important to him. His was the only family in the world that got up at dawn to have a Marlboro breakfast on the grill, or go hunting for sea monsters on the beach at 4:08 a.m. Or convince his kids every year on Christmas Eve that yes, that WAS Rudolph out there, up in the sky, and they better get to bed, QUICK!

Yet, through all the fun, they learned valuable lessons. They learned Dad was Dad, not a friend. His sole purpose was to raise them up right. The friendship came as they grew older and the relationships changed from children to adults.

But although John loved his own family, he wasn’t always thrilled about crowds and other people. On their 50th wedding anniversary, John and Cay’s children planned a surprise weekend getaway to Deep Creek Lake. Timing it perfectly, the entire clan arrived at the lodge at the same time, just after John and Cay had gotten into their rooms. As everyone was unloading to surprise them at the door, John said to Cay something like “geez, look at all those kids out there”, whereupon Cay went to the window, looked out and said “John, those are OUR kids”!!!!

Even as he took care of his family, John maintained friendships and interests of his own. Remarkably, he had many friendships going back as far as first grade and his first neighborhood! Taking all his relationships seriously, he was a great organizer of reunions for his high school, the West Baltimore Club and many other groups and clubs to which he belonged. One of his favorite events for years was the annual “Toilet Bowl”, a tongue-in-cheek flag football game version of the professional bowl games that he and his friends participated in. Horse racing was another of John’s passions which he took seriously; studying the horses and their history, following them from the early January races through the Triple Crown and into the Winter Breeder’s Cup.

His talent in football led him to receive his Varsity letters at Forest Park, followed by a scholarship to University of Maryland. John’s sense of duty to his country inspired him to defer his scholarship and enlist in the USMC, solidifying the values already inherent in him. After returning from Korea, he exercised his scholarship and became All Maryland his first year. Truly living the Marine Corps values throughout his life, John was ever faithful to family and friends, lending support and help wherever needed. Extremely generous in all aspects, he was truly a man who would do anything for anyone, sharing his knowledge and talent willingly.

John shared his love of sports with his children and with countless children in the community, coaching football, softball and lacrosse, becoming commissioner of the Catonsville Lacrosse Program. He was always one of the most favored and respected coaches, working patiently with every child, honing each one’s skills. He cared about the kids, more than winning the game. However, because he taught, encouraged, cared and never insulted or demeaned any of his players, he taught them to win, and often ended up with winning teams.

John worked at the telephone company, through its many name changes, becoming a supervisor before taking an early retirement. For his kids, the best part of his job was when he would come home for lunch and take them for rides in his phone company truck up and down the street. Not ready to fully retire, he used his excellent communication and negotiation skills to become a right of way agent for a real property company.

John stayed constantly busy. Even as his illness progressed, he pushed forward with incredible determination. He continued to work in his landscaped yard and workshop, play tennis and work out at the health club several times a week, attend his weekly breakfast and organization meetings, and attend church. At the age of 82, he took a solo road trip to Florida for two weeks. John fought his illness, defeating it time and again, defying the odds.

Wherever he went, John became “everybody’s favorite”, leaving his mark on the world. His upbeat style of joking, laughing, and creating relationships daily continued through his hospice care. Despite his failing health, he continued to project good will and a positive attitude. On January 9th, John, in his own way, decided to bypass his planned assisted living move and return to his beloved Cay, who he knew would be waiting for him at the finish line.

John is survived by children and spouses Cathy and Grant Menefee, Julie Francis, Jane and Tommy Perkins, Andy Francis and fiancé Nikki Orthner and grandchildren Emilie, Luke and John Menefee, Sarah [Seth] and Tracie Snyder, Tommy [Diana] Perkins, Heather [Nate] Kocon, Catie Jane and Billy Perkins, LCpl Andrew and Kayla Francis. He was predeceased by grandson LCpl Matt Snyder and granddaughter Lauren Francis.

Visitation will be on Thursday, January 12th, from 3-5 and 7-9 at Candlelight Funeral Home, 1835 Frederick Road, Catonsville, MD. A Funeral Mass will be held on Friday, January 13th at 9:00 a.m. at St. Joseph Monastery, 3801 Old Frederick Road, 21229, with interment to follow at Garrison Forest Veterans Cemetery, Owings Mills, MD at 10:45.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made in John’s memory to the Ft. McHenry National Monument, c/o Ranger Shannon, 2400 East Fort Avenue, Baltimore, MD 21230 or, on John’s request, to the LCpl Matt Snyder Camp Snoops Project, P.O. Box 281, Douglassville, PA 19518.